I was still determined though, no matter how much it was hurting to continue. I wrote this:
This afternoon is for rest. Self hugging. Self love. Silence. Letting our head be what it is.
Some days are better than others.
Some days thoughts are more annoying than a biblically dripping tap.
Some days they feel louder and more powerful than the fiercest ogress or the sound I produced in the theatre group last night.
This evening we will go out again.
Because life will triumph. And we have a life to continue to build.
Thoughts won't win. They are only thoughts. Habits from a past made present. They are not necessarily real.
I think I can say, a year on, that such determination has been paying off.
And that is something for which I can offer deep gratitude. Yes, my gratitude diary hasn't been happening. I let it not happen when I was ill for a week and haven't restarted it. There's been a lot to be thankful for in events, people, capabilities, and all manner of things that are too easy to take for granted.
Today I am thankful that life has been triumphing. I'm thankful too that I have a writing workshop and a theatre workshop to go to today. And that the sun is shining and that spilling milk this morning all over a blanket is so easily fixed with a washing machine!

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